Drunken kisses in bars and nightclubs: do they count?

Everyone’s done it before: you go to bars and nightclubs, have a few drinks, and then out of nowhere, you’re kissing a complete stranger…or worse, your friend. We all like to pretend that these drunken kisses in the middle of the night mean nothing, but the truth is that these kisses have the power to make your friendship awkward. At the very least, they can leave you with a “Why did I do that?” thought running through your head throughout the next day.

Drunken kissing can occur for various reasons: mutual attraction, stupidity, daring, their faces were too close, or because they felt like it. So here’s the question so many people ask themselves the next day: did that drunken kiss count? Should everything be canceled because of alcohol? Or did the kiss mean something else? Do you have to deal with it or pretend it never happened?

A drunken kiss that definitely doesn’t count is a kiss from a friends dare after drinking too much at a bar or nightclub. This shouldn’t be allowed to do something awkward because you probably didn’t want to do it in the first place, but you were forced to do it, otherwise you’d lose face. Write it down as if you finished a challenge you set for yourself and move on.

Similarly, kissing just because you felt like it or because you bumped into your face (it happens, trust me) should be ignored and forgotten. Impulsiveness is a characteristic of being drunk; don’t confuse wanting to kiss someone ‘just because’ with genuine emotions. Unless you have those feelings for them for the next day or week, erase them from your memory.

If you were attracted to them at first, then of course the drunken kiss could mean something else. However, don’t assume the other person feels the same way. There’s never anything more crushing than hearing your crush say, “Yeah, let’s just forget about last night, shall we?” The best way to resolve this kiss is to casually mention it the next day: for example, “Hey, what we did last night…”, or something similar. Leave it open, if the other person doesn’t immediately say “Please let’s forget about it” then chances are it means more to them as well.

But with any situation, there are gray areas. If you used to date, or if one of you has a boyfriend/girlfriend, it becomes more complex. The boyfriend/girlfriend situation should be a no-go zone after that night: unless you’re planning on breaking up, the longer you chase it, the more complicated and difficult it becomes. Similarly, if you used to date, you need to weigh the situation before deciding that the kiss was a “signal” and that you should get back together.

There’s nothing wrong with a drunken kiss or two on a night out at a bar; in fact, it can add to your night, or at least add to your crazy memories. Just make sure you clear things up so it doesn’t get awkward later if it’s a friend. If it’s a stranger, then a pash-and-dash might be appropriate. Just make sure it’s not someone you’ll see again.