2 ways to discover your reason for being – Razón de Ser
Raison D’Etre is French for reason or purpose, for the existence of someone or something. Each and every person comes into this world with a purpose, unique talents to achieve that purpose, and the inner wisdom to guide them along the way. This is a birthright. Without exceptions. Since everyone who walks this Earth exists, you would think that everyone knows their purpose in life. Unfortunately, many people are disconnected from their Raison d’etre and are plodding along, successful or unsuccessful, wasting their life energy and time doing something that may feed them and their family, but starve their souls.
We do not live in an either-or world. We live in an “and” world. You can do both. Simply put, the reason he’s here is to express his full potential using his unique qifts. You are here to harness the intuition-driven passion that accomplishes the purpose of bringing your unique gifts into this world, expansively. For those who feed their soul, do what makes their heart sing, work is play and every day is an opportunity to express to the world who they are, what they are here for. Life flows seemingly effortlessly. Even with the ups and downs, the twists and turns, life is fulfilling and worth the journey!
For those who live off purpose, doing what they think they ‘should’ be doing, life can be exhausting and unfulfilling, even if they are successful. Those who have turned their backs on their raison d’être feel something is missing and sometimes joke that they “still don’t know what they want to be when they grow up” until well into adulthood. If you struggle to find joy, energy, and fulfillment in your work and in your life, you are living with purpose. You are not living a life in alignment with who you are at your deepest core. Chances are, you don’t even know what your unique talents are, let alone use them. The funny thing is that many people don’t see what their special gift is because it’s so easy for them. They find it so easy and effortless to do what they naturally excel at that they believe anyone can do it. It does not occur to them that this unique talent is theirs as a birthright with which to express themselves and build their lives around.
“Seek the wisdom that will untie your knot, seek the path that demands your whole being.” ~Rumi
There are two easy ways to take a look at who you really are and what is your unique gift to share with the world:
1. Think back to when you were a child. Who did you admire or aspire to be? Was it a famous person, a character in a book or movie, a relative, or a teacher? Who amazed you, made you stop and pay attention? Once you have identified this person, what attributes of this person impressed you? Were they brave, funny, larger than life, strong, loving, free, generous, smart? What did this person or fictional character do that caught your attention? List as many attributes and actions as you can.
For example, as a child I was in awe of a character I saw in a movie on TV, “Auntie Mame.” Auntie Mame was a woman who was eclectic, fun, fashionable, she surrounded herself with wonderfully strange creative and talented people, traveled the world and experienced fun and fascinating events in her life. She lived through this rich life experience and mentored others to do the same. Oh, how I wanted to be Auntie Mame! However, I didn’t see myself as outgoing enough to put myself ‘out there’ like she did, take risks and stand up for who she is and what she believed in. As an adult, I reconnected with my truth and now live a life centered on the truth of who I am, enjoying rich and delicious experiences, surrounded by a wonderfully eclectic group of talented people, and guiding others to live their lives so richly, whatever that means. them
Who you aspire to be, what speaks to your soul as a child, is a mirror of who you are. You love what you see in that person or character because it is a reflection of you! Show up in your life expressing your inner Auntie Mame, Ninja Warrior, your hero.
2. What gives you energy? Think back to a time when you were ‘in the zone’. You were totally present, in the moment, doing whatever you were doing, fully enjoying it without any sense of time and space. You were totally focused and brimming with creativity. These ‘in the zone’ experiences are windows into your special gifts, your unique talents. You’re energized, firing on all cylinders. These are the moments when YOU fully express yourself.
“The best thing you can do is be good at being yourself!” – Denis the Menace
As an example, here’s an anecdote about Krista Vernoff, head writer and Emmy Award nominee for the TV show “Grey’s Anatomy.” Although she loved to write, Krista thought that she was supposed to be an actress. She had the belief that one had a better chance of making a living as an actress than as a writer. Many well-meaning relatives suggested working as a cook out of concern about her career choice. She became quite good as an actress and made a living at it. Still, she couldn’t stop writing. Writing came so easily to her that she didn’t give herself much credit as a writer. “You have to work hard for a living” and she was definitely working hard to be a working actress. For Krista, being an actress was exhausting! Writing was a game, what he did for fun, what he did to feed her soul. Her success as a writer was always a certainty.
One day, a fellow actor in a play noticed Krista running to her dressing room to write when she wasn’t needed on stage. Most of the actors lived to be on stage where Krista lived to be off stage so she could write. Once this fellow actor commented on this backwards state of affairs, Krista realized that if she was going to live a fulfilling life, she had to recognize and honor who she is: a writer. At the end of the play, Krista dedicated her life to expanding and expressing her raison d’être: writing!
When you commit, give all your attention and energy to staying firmly focused on the truth of who you are, life is magical. You have fed your soul, you are complete. As a whole person, you have the inner resources to give to others, whether through your craft or your presence in their lives. You have the energy and desire to share yourself with the rest of the world. You live life on purpose, in the zone, and tap into the passion and wisdom that is yours and yours alone. This is what you are here to do. Find a way to spend more time doing what puts you “in the zone.”
If you are not satisfied or fully committed to your life, you have a choice. Will you remain committed to this unfulfilling life or will you discover and commit to your reason for being? A fulfilling life begins when you go beyond the outer threshold of your comfort zone. The choice is yours.
“Be who you are and say what you feel. Those who care don’t matter and those who matter don’t care.” -Dr Seuss
Copyright (c) 2009 Valery Satterwhite